blah

well my life hasnt been to bad... reason for not posting anything here...

but well a few things got me down. one being finding out that i have 2 events on the same day and its not like i really have a choice and the one i really want to go to i wont be able to. so im pissed as shit about it ;.; i dont know if i can find some way to go to both but i will see....

another issues is boys i dont know if i ever will get a guy or anything. i like this guy but i dont know nothing is working... we were suppose to hang out sunday but he "supposivly" got into a fight with his parents... ok whatever i'll believe him but shit he didnt say he couldnt come till 2HRS AFTER!

;.; i was so depressed he stood me up! and then he was suppose to make it up on tuesday... and again... stood me up. i dont know this isnt going well... fuck i dont even know if he likes me but shit dont fucken say you'll go out and then not call or tell me so i dont look like an idiot waiting for you.

i want to just rip his balls out! and maybe take one of his eyes out as well!! or something! fucker!
i guess i really am undisirable or maybe im not interesting maybe im not his type.. fuck

i hate unrequited love the only other guy i liked was the same thing.. well actualy he was married and had 2 kids and i was to much of a pussy to tell him. so nothing happend i did tell him at the end of the year ah god i really wish he wasnt married or didnt mind divorcing his wife for a hs student.